On: The Ordinary

“If your life's at a juncture and you need to think about things, there's nowhere better than home. However old you are.” 
― Sophie Kinsella, Twenties Girl

Today I had to drop my mom off at the airport after spending two full weeks having her visit our new home. It was harder than the day I left for college. Why? Because I finally realized that unless she moves here I will never get to spend ordinary time with her again.

I always thought that moving home to New Mexico meant that I would have failed. I wouldn't have an exciting career or an extraordinary life because I would be just like everyone else who never moved away from home. I wanted to be better than that - I wanted to conquer the world.

Yet, now I look back and realize I'm not completely happy without my family. I'm missing out on important family events. Last week my Grandma turned 80 years old, and I wasn't able to be there to celebrate. I want to be able to go shopping with my mom on weekends or just watch TV with my dad.

Life isn't just the outrageous and courageous moments we need to strive for, I want to be ordinary. And, don't get me wrong I love building my little family in North Carolina, Ryan and Riley are amazing and I want to be with them forever, but I want to laugh with my parents while we're grocery shopping and play boggle with my Grandma. I miss home. I miss my family.

Now, I just need to figure out my next move. I need to take my frustration and come up with a productive solution. Enough tears, more action. Today is my first step to finding my happy ordinary life. I just want to be happy. Here goes nothing.

My mom and I - October 5, 2012 in Uptown Charlotte